Farrah Rudd: Mental Health, Valentine's Day and Singles Awareness Day

Mental health, Valentine’s Day  & singles awareness day. 

Single or coupled up: I have been on both sides of the coin when speaking of Valentine’s Day. And I can say one is not better than the other. This “Hallmark holiday“ can spark all kinds of emotions besides love. Singles Awareness Day might also spark these emotions. For some, we are left feeling emotionally cold. For others it makes our heart flutter. 

Yesterday, I couldn’t even go out of my house without knowing Valentine’s Day was coming. It was is as if this were a national holiday. It got me thinking how does it affect our psychosis. For one: did you know our brains are fueled by dopamine, they crave and drool over it. Just like Pavlov‘s dogs. But not all dopamine is good dopamine. For example: expectations (on Valentine’s Day) + reality matter a great deal. Big expectations  (maybe diamonds) coupled with a small reality equals less or zero dopamine released.

 While small expectations (nothing) + a big reality is more dopamine released.

Think about that and this year the societal pressure seem worse to make it perfect. Everywhere you turn whether it be Instagram, Facebook or TikTok posts they seem to have the perfectly orchestrated music, flowers, candies & more attached. Who wouldn’t feel pressured. I believe being single for some of us is just as important as being coupled up. We are all in different seasons. Some may not know Valentine’s Day can be a real bummer. It’s not all chocolate and roses in everyone’s eyes. Everyone’s living a different reality on this “Hallmark holiday”.  Whether that’s newly single, widowed, or newly engaged.  But let’s take into account Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be romantic.

I think the most important thing for all of us, single or not, is to stay in the present reality and practice self-love. Ponder on the last time you did something nice for yourself. Some may find this time of the year a bit depressing especially present day living in the snow and drab, wintery days. I learned from a dear friend many years ago during my bout with depression (more on that in another blog) the best thing we can do for ourselves is to surround ourselves with all of our favorite things. This doesn’t have to be anything over the top. After all: simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. A candle, your favorite socks, TV show, chocolates, tea, a plush robe or a heating pad. The most important thing is creating a safe place for us to feel loved. There’s one thing we should never give up on and that’s ourselves. 

The important piece surrounding our mental health with Valentine’s Day and singles awareness day is not only checking in on ourselves but checking in on our loved ones. We are all living in a tougher time than we’re used to.  A lot of us are missing out on love everywhere you turn. Try not to assume everyone is in a good place with all of the perpetual love surrounding today. Not everyone is catching cupids bow.

So in the name of love while you are doing something nice for yourself today, make that extra phone call and let someone else know they’re not alone. 

Farrah Rudd, also known as the 5 Ft. CEO, will be a regular columnist at Warren County Online News.   She is a real estate agent in southwest Ohio.  She has a Bachelor's degree in Psychology. 

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